


26. Abandoned

by lucky_katebishop



Category: Daredevil (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Defenders (Marvel TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Gen, Whump, Whumptober 2019, brief Peter mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-27
Updated: 2019-10-27
Packaged: 2021-01-04 07:08:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21193634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lucky_katebishop/pseuds/lucky_katebishop
Summary: We learned what happened to the MCU when Thanos snapped his fingers. Now we get to find out what happened to The Defenders during that time... specifically what happened when Matt was the only one who survived.





	26. Abandoned

**Author's Note:**

> I feel like it would fit Matt to have been the only one who survives, especially since his whole Catholic martyr thing. Enjoy!

He could still hear their heartbeats most nights. He could still feel the dust between his fingers, and could still hear the sounds of blood curdling screams coming from outside the office. 

Matt couldn’t comprehend what was happening. One second, he was laughing with Foggy and Karen, and then they were just… gone. He just barely heard their heartbeats fade before it was completely silent in the office. 

He never considered it comforting, Foggy and Karen’s heartbeats. It might as well have been air to him, it was second nature to hear them. Foggy’s was steady, while Karen’s was jagged and pulsated quite a bit, especially when she got new ideas. He’d do anything to hear them again, even for just a second. 

It was as if his mind was tilted on an axis, the way he stumbled his way around their office, only to feel dust under his shoes.

He felt eleven years old again, before his powers came into fruition. He felt truly blind. 

He had to rely on the walls to guide him towards outside, only to be more confused. Car alarms and screaming filled the air, and he could smell blood and dust wafting through the wind. 

He could hear heartbeat after heartbeat disappearing, along with the words, “worldwide catastrophe” and “end of days.” 

Matt’s hand guided him towards his phone, and led him to his contacts list. 

Voicemail after voicemail led him to sink down to the ground. 

Maggie, Claire, Jessica, Luke, Danny, Colleen, Frank, Wade… none of them answered. His heart clenched as his finger hovered over the microphone button to call the last person he had, too afraid because he had a sinking feeling they wouldn’t answer. He swallowed the lump in his throat and mustered up enough courage to order his phone to call him. 

“Hi, this is Peter! I can’t come to the phone right now, sorry, but I’ll try to get back to you!” 

_ Jesus, not the kid. Anyone but the goddamn kid. _

Matt clutched his phone to his chest and shut his eyes to stop the burning. He tried to convince himself that not all of them were gone, that one of them would call him just thirty minutes later and he wouldn’t be completely alone, but it was no use. He knew in his heart that he was the only one left. 

If this was Judgement Day, he’d let himself be consumed by the Devil. 

*

He left New York. 

Call it survivor’s guilt, or whatever, but he had to get out of there. 

It had been a year of being completely taken over by Daredevil when he almost bled out in a back alley when an old woman helped him up and took care of him. He learned to discover that she was also blind. 

“You’re going to kill yourself if you continue like this,” the woman told him while stitching up a cut on his forehead. 

“What’d be the problem with that?” Matt grumbled before he could stop himself. The woman dug her needle further in his skin, making him yelp. 

“Everybody lost someone. Stop acting like you have a monopoly on pain. Quit being an asshole and _ move on. _”

She reminded him of Maggie, which only made his heart clench just a bit more. 

So, he fled to San Francisco. Foggy always said he wanted to visit there, so Matt thought it was fitting. 

He set up a little practice, mostly all pro bono, and let the petty cases of landlord disputes and evictions fill his mind as he avoided the chest in closet the best he could. 

No longer Daredevil, he had to live the redundant and powerless life as Matthew Murdock. 

Some nights he would call them, letting their voicemails satisfy the longing and loneliness in him. 

Some nights his dreams were so vivid that he woke up thinking that the blip, or whatever they called it, was just a grand illusion, only to be swallowed by grief every single time. 

Most nights he didn’t sleep, however. 

He let himself be consumed by coffee and sleep deprivation, letting his alertness deteriorate in favor of thinking of his old friends. 

The only bruises and cuts he got now was from his brain being too preoccupied thinking of his old life to notice the lamp posts or walls in front of him. 

He grew grayer, older, and lonelier every passing day. 

He was a shell of the person he used to know; living on auto-pilot most of the time. 

He tried moving on, and even went on a couple dates here or there. He tried to cope with alcohol and meaningless sex, only to feel more shallow inside. He tried new hobbies, only to result in dissociation. 

He tried, tried, tried. Matthew Murdock was sick of trying to move on, for he knew that he never could. He’d been abandoned. 

Five years came and went. He’d given up hope that his family would return a long time ago. 

He was in court, half-heartedly making his case for why his client’s landlord should be sued when he heard something he truly thought he’d never hear again. 

A shrill automated voice calling out the name Foggy over and over again filled the court room’s walls. 

All his limbs went stiff, and for the first time in four years, he felt alert. 

A second later and people started appearing out of nowhere in the courtroom, looking disheveled. Phones started ringing and beeping, and all Matt could hear were heartbeats. 

He pushed his way towards his phone, not giving a damn if people found it suspicious that a blind man was aware of his surroundings, and clicked the answer button. 

“Hey, Matt, where are you? What the hell happened to the office?” Matt didn’t resist the sob that he let out, and let tears fill his eyes. 

“Matty? What’s wrong? Where are you?” 

Matt couldn’t bring it to himself to answer. Instead, he grabbed his briefcase and ran out of the court house towards the airport to catch a plane to New York. 

And if, once he got there, he cried tears of joy and disbelief in front of Foggy and Karen, he didn’t let it get to him, because all that mattered was that his family was _ home. _He’d never let the sound of their heartbeats become second nature again. 


End file.
